New Delhi: With the large youth population and their divergent views on romantic relationships, the idea of relationships and marriage in India has undergone a significant change in recent years.
The foundation of a romantic relationship has long been based on the institution of marriage, particularly in Indian society. Because of how dependent men and women were on one another in marriage, this constitution has endured for years despite all challenges, no matter how big or small. The youth of today are self-sufficient in all facets of life, financially, emotionally, and mentally. The need to be dependent on a partner is gradually vanishing, and both men and women are open to relationships without boundaries.
Technology has a significant influence on how people view relationships today. People no longer value the perseverance and effort it takes to build a meaningful relationship because everything, from food to information to dating, is just a click away. They view it as a waste of time if it takes longer to accomplish the goal. Relationships and all other facets of life have been influenced by this mindset. Despite little sacrifice, people still desire love. Still seeking harmony, but with few concessions. Today, a lot of people in India date multiple people without taking the time to get to know them. At the first sign of “incompatibility,” they move on to the next person, looking for the unique chemistry that only exists in rom-coms.
Due to this behaviour, marriages are no longer seen as the throne of a stable relationship and the idea of monogamy sounds like a crisis. Everyone loves the idea of falling in love, but very few people are willing to put in the effort necessary to achieve it, and those who do tend to get easily bored. This causes a lot of disappointment and resentment in those who are already married, which fuels an increase in extramarital affairs. For individuals who fit this description, there’s a good chance that marriage took place either too soon in their lives, leaving them with a fear of not having had other romantic experiences or a need to try them right away. Some people wonder or worry that they are with the wrong person because they feel it.
These individuals have always been present in Indian society, and on a large scale. In January 2020 Gleeden – an extramarital dating app presented a study, conducted by IPSOS, about the state of Infidelity in India. According to the results gathered by IPSOS, 55 per cent Indians had already been unfaithful to their current partner at least once at the time of the interview out of which 54 per cent were men and 56 per cent were women. This shows exactly the state of a “happily ever after” marriage in India. The important question to decode here is if someone is unhappy in their marriage why not just break it off, move on and divorce your partner?
The truth is that not many people still have the courage to end a long-term marriage with a separation or divorce. Dust is still swept under the carpet, as preferred. Thus, Gleeden-like apps have enjoyed tremendous success in India. Most of their users come from highly affluent backgrounds. Professionals with college degrees and high-paying jobs are both men and women. There are also many housewives among the engineers, business owners, consultants, managers, and executives. In terms of age, men tend to be over 35 while women tend to be over 26.
Sharing about this shift in monogamy and infidelity in Indians, Sybil Shiddell, Country Manager India for Gleeden said: “The Indian society has been very quiet on matters related to marriage for many years but 2022 has seen a lot of people starting to embrace the concept that monogamy is not forcefully the only way, and more and more couples are opening their marriages to adventure and experimentation. However, it is important to understand that there could be multiple reasons behind infidelity and it does not always depend on the behaviour of the spouse.
Mostly, people cheat because they feel something is missing in their life and they fancy a new adventure. For some people, cheating could also be beneficial to the couple and add some spiciness to their marriage. An IPSOS study, as well as some internal surveys, found out that physical attraction and sex, lack of attention from the current partner and desire for a blowing romance are the most common drives that lead to an extramarital affair.”
She adds: “Even as we speak about people and their desires, there isn’t a one-fits-all formula. Everything depends on the individuals and the reasons behind infidelity. In the ideal world, transparency and consent should be the preconditions: both people involved in an extramarital relationship must know that one of them (or both) is married and that they would want to stay that way making this new relationship always secondary.
There should be these predefined rules like we have on Gleeden: a dating app devoted to extramarital dating, where conditions and expectations are all in the “open”. The intent is clear and there is no room for misinterpretation. This doesn’t happen on traditional dating apps, where one can pretend to be single and easily lie to their dates about the marital status and real intent of that encounter.”