How do you know if a man is in love with you if he hasn’t explicitly dropped the l-bomb? Well, since more than half of human communication is nonverbal, coupled with the fact that men are even less verbal than women, we give a lot of our thoughts and emotions away through our body language. Usually, we don’t even notice what our body is doing or how it gives us away.
It’s always a good idea to pay attention to a man’s actions rather than just taking his words at face value. Words are easy to say, but is he backing them up with action?
So, if you’re dating a man who tends to be reserved with his feelings and you’re unsure of where you stand, here are subtle body language signs of a man who is secretly in love with you and hasn’t found how to put it into words yet.
14 Body language signs of a man secretly in love with you
1. He mirrors your body language
When a man is secretly in love with you, his body language will naturally mirror yours. If you’re resting a hand on your face, he will rest a hand on his face. If you lean in close to him at the table, he will lean in closer to you.
Pay attention to this next time you’re with him or anyone you have a good connection with. Chances are, you’ll find yourself doing the same thing.
2. He can’t take his eyes off you
Another strong sign that a man is secretly in love with you is when his body language is laser-focused on you, like a seagull that has seen a kid drop a french fry at the beach, i.e., he cannot stop looking at you!
If you’re at an event together and end up at different corners of the room, keep an eye out to see if his eyes are on you from a distance. A man in love will be so captivated by you that he cannot pry his eyes away. And the more he looks at you, the deeper his feelings grow.
3. He smiles at you with his eyes
A fake smile is when you smile just with your mouth. In contrast, a genuine, natural smile is when you can see it in someone’s eyes. The lines at the corners of their eyes will turn upwards, and their whole face will light up. You can tell when someone is truly smiling at you because it feels warm and sincere as opposed to forced.
The body language of a man secretly in love with you will be natural and genuine. His smile will reach his eyes, indicating that he is truly happy with you.
4. He naturally gravitates toward you
Does your man find any excuse to be by your side, nestled up with you on the sofa, or brushing his legs against yours under the table at dinner?
Depending on your personality and love language, you might find this a little overwhelming, but know that it’s simply because he cannot get enough of you. His body language is telling you he wants to be physically and emotionally intimate with you.
This can also be a strong sign when a man is in lust with a woman. But if he’s struggling to give you personal space (in a good way, not in a creepy, controlling way) and his touches linger a little longer than usual, he’s probably in love.
5. He is nervous around you
You know how sometimes you play with your hair when attracted to a guy? Well, when a man is in love, his body language will take a restless, fidgety turn. He might tap his fingers, shake his leg, or touch his face or neck more than usual.
These are all signs he is nervous around you because he likes you so much and wants you to want him back. He is secretly in love with you and doesn’t know how to say it.
6. He faces you
If a man is in love with you, he will lean his shoulders toward you whenever he’s close to you. This is because he wants to create a sacred space for both of you that’s like a world of your own. Plus, he genuinely cares about what you have to say and wants to catch every word.
He’s not going to be super awkward and start shuffling around like a crazy person making sure he is never not facing you, but generally, the front of his body will gravitate towards yours.
7. He’s visibly happy when you are around
Another body language sign of a man secretly in love with you is that he is noticeably happy when you’re with him. Naturally, we all have bad days and things that put us in a funk, like when you turn up to your favorite burrito place for lunch and find out, they’re totally wiped out of burritos. But generally, when a man is in love, he will be visibly in a cheery mood around you.
When you experience something new or exciting, your body releases dopamine, which is known as a happy hormone. This is why falling in love can be so addictive and all-consuming—it triggers a reward response in your brain that keeps you coming back for more.
So, what should you look out for?
- A boost in his energy levels
- Telling jokes / being playful
- Laughing a lot
- Showing off or doing something to capture your attention
- Getting louder
8. He instinctively protects you
Men are biologically wired to protect the people they love, so it makes sense this is one of the body language signs of a man secretly in love with you.
He might walk you to your door after a date to make sure you get home safe or call you as soon as you get in. He might make sure he walks on the outside of the sidewalk nearest the traffic so that you’re out of harm’s way. Or he might squeeze your hand a little tighter as you cross a busy road together or pull you toward him when a bus whizzes past at high speed.
A man in love will go out of his way to ensure you’re safe, especially when you’re with him. He will see this as his duty.
9. His pupils dilate when he talks to you
Dopamine and oxytocin are both happy hormones associated with falling in love, and they can make your pupils dilate. So next time you’re close to him, pay extra attention to his pupils. If they’re bigger than usual, it’s because he is secretly in love with you.
10. He frequently breaks the physical touch barrier
Breaking the physical touch barrier is one of the best ways to convey to anyone that you’re attracted to them. Generally, lighter touches indicate attraction, like when he brushes against your arm, places his hand on the small of your back and gives you a quick hug.
But when a man is secretly in love, his body language will go deeper than this. He might hug you but hold onto you for more than a moment and subtly breathe in the aroma of your hair. Or he might hold your hands the entire way through a movie.
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The deeper a man falls in love with you, the closer he will physically get to you.
11. You can see his hands
Another subtle body language sign of a man secretly in love with you is if you can always see his hands. This might sound strange but stick with me for a second.
When a man crosses his arms or stands with his hands in his pockets, he is subconsciously creating a physical barrier between you and him which signals that he is not romantically interested in you. In contrast, if his hands are always out in front of him and open, it’s because he doesn’t want anything between you. He wants to look more approachable and draw you toward him.
12. He peacocks
When a man is with a woman he loves, he will become more self-conscious and want to look good for her. Look out for new clothes or style choices, his hand running through his hair, straightening his shirt as you walk over to him, or doing a touch-up in front of you. He will probably start to ask for your opinion because he values it and wants to impress you.
13. He is affectionate toward you in front of his friends
This is a big deal, and unless a man is emotionally invested in you, he’s probably not even going to introduce you to his friends or family. So if you get to that step and he is also being affectionate with you in front of his buddies, it’s a strong indication that he is secretly in love with you and just hasn’t managed to verbalize it yet.
14. He walks with you
Pay attention to this guy’s pace when you’re walking home from a date or having a lazy stroll in the park on a Sunday morning. Is he walking ahead of you, lagging behind you, or is he matching your pace?
A man secretly in love with you cares enough to slow his stride down and walk by your side. He will also probably hold your hand or have his arm around your shoulders. As I said, he wants to be physically close to you and enjoys conversing with you, so it’s only natural for him to walk by your side.
Now that you know the body language signs of a man secretly in love with you, what’s the verdict? Is he head over heels for you, or are you still unsure? Share your story with me in the comments below.